Let's move

Call out to Mothers. Inspiring doings named as "Let's Move" initiative and motherhood issues (by the First Lady)

Going through the daily articles and news of what’s happening around the world I would like to share something that really attracted and inspired me.

First Lady Michelle Obama sat down with a small group of women at the White House yesterday to discuss her "Let's Move" initiative. The roundtable discussion quickly turned to other topics, including fitness, healthy eating, work-life balance, and finding some semblance of a private family life while living in the public eye. Here's the first lady's point of view about some of the things that matter most to moms:

On women who feel disenfranchised or disempowered by what's going on with the world:

"The truth is, the greatest power I feel like I have is raising two more intelligent, decent people and putting them in the world prepared to give and contribute," she says.

Changing the big picture takes time, she pointed out, and the best thing to do is focus on the things you can control. "If everyone focused on raising their kids and doing the best that they can do at it, in addition to working and all that," she says, "there are hundreds of wonderfully small changes that we can make in our lives if we're doing all that. That becomes the collage of real change."

When confronted with the economy and the wars and the environment and all of the big problems in the world, "we lose sign of the fact that day-to-day work is really how change happens," she says. "So I would urge them not to get discouraged."

It's important to remember that the next generation was born seeing the world differently than we do. "They're born into a different way of thinking that I think is good," she says. "They're more open. They're more curious. The world is different. And each generation, just by the sheer fact that they come on this Earth, is creating change."

"That's sometimes more real than changing legislation," she added.(courtesy, Yahoo Shine)

When I finished reading this article I was filled with a great feeling of relief as it had answered most of the questions that had been bothering me lately. The kind of chaos, distress and frustration that is going on these days in my home country Pakistan worries and scares me just as it does to most of the common people. While I feel unable to go out and make a big change this is the right way of thinking. The big change can only happen if there is change at the individual level.

A Chinese proverb explains it better as it says that “every single grain of rice matters”. We all have our duties to fulfill towards a bigger achievement and being a mother is the most important role that one can have in this world. A mother is the first institution that a child has. So this impact is long lasting and has a great importance. I hope that this call out of thoughts for mother is helpful for all the readers. Happy contribution moms

Beautifully Balanced out

Today I happened to read an article on Yahoo.com. It was about a person who earned only $40,000/- a year and he had an amazing way of splitting his earnings. He and his wife made a roughly sketched out plan about starting a family in few years down the road and till that time spend one salary and save the other. While reducing the existing debt they had planned to save up some money so that when they start a family they could survive with one person doing the job.

Once they decided to get along with this principal of spending they had to tie up their wishes and rethink of impulsive buying habits and argue with one’self for final decision of buying something. This principal where helped them go through an equation of earn and spend they had to bear the so called peer pressure. But o matter who says what they kept on sticking along and eventually today they are a perfect example of balanced spending nature.

This didn’t stop here but they inculcated the same principal in their young daughter. Told her how she can earn money while doing household chores (to begin with). The best part of this entire story is that once their daughter would have a weekly earnings of $10 she would split it into three parts. 10% for Give away, 25% for saving and the remaining for spending (all of these categories were kept in three separate jars) . Whenever she would accompany her parents to a store and want to buy something she was told that they will have to look into her spending jar how much money she has and also for the saving part so that she can buy her things. She also helped people in her own kiddi way with the help of her Give away money. She bought a gift for an orphan kid at her father’s school, helped a family get some groceries (just to name a few)

In our language we use a term ‘Meezan’, quite elaborative in meanings. In Islam the basic principal of spending is somewhat very similar. Let’s not get into hard core mathematical division and percentage but the base line is so similar. Once you get your income divide it into portions for helping other, saving and then spend the rest of it. But I was amazed to read this article in the western world and hoping to see an example in our so called hardcore Islamic societies.

Pride and prejudice redefined

It was a lovely evening long drive and an impulsive shopping spree that took me and my hubby to the Lark n Finch sale to the most wanted streets of Lahore. Yes I am talking about MM Alam Road of Gulberg. My went in the shop to have aquick look and if it was worth making an effort  he would call me for the final approval (I love this feeling of giving final go ahead, J typical wife thing J .

So while I was waiting I started looking at the shops around and there was a sign I first misread. But then I went over to the door and read it again. The Sign said “ No men allowed without family” this is actually and truly a sign written on the door of a very famous clothing outlet. I felt a shock that may be they wanted to say something and it is being misread or mot written appropriately. But sadly enough I discovered that they did mean that no men are allowed if they don’t have a family. Here we are living God knows whatever escalated hip named society one can think of. But this is against the very human rights when you have the owners and male workers roaming around and being present at the outlet. How can you deprive men of not shopping from such a place? I think that men and women both should place a protest of redefining Pride and prejudice in today’s progressing society. It is totally understandable if it a secluded item with only a female items and female shoppers. If families are allowed I am wondering they would be asking for a proof next time that says that you are a family of accompany and God know s what would come next …

Mid life gals

The excitement of finally meeting one of my gal friends after a period of 11 years was not only refreshing but realizing that best friends remain on the same wave length even if they meet after ages. We were school friends since class 7^th and then went to college together and then as per usual norms (10 years ago) my friend got married after completing her bachelor’s degree. I went on with my further studies and we kept on talking on and off to be in touch but gradually this connection slipped down to few calls a year. Which was terrible but then she had 4 kids and a whole JOINT Family system TO LOOK AFTER and I MANAGED a full time corporate job, marriage and 2 kids. So we both realized that being hands full with an active life style at least we know who is where even if we call once in a while during the year. Coming back to old friend’s reunion, the meeting was all planned and pushed by another dear mutual friend of ours who lives in another city and whenever shed visited Lahore would always crave to meet up all three of us for good old school times sake, but some how we couldn’t plan out something. Finally, few days back when my friend visited from out of Lahore we managed to meet up and planned to sit down at a place and treasure our old memories. The plan was just the three of us and no kids allowed.

When we saw each other at our meeting place we actually wanted to scream like school days, hug and jump and let our manners actually go wild. But we just hugged each other warmly, greeted and sat down calmly. Slowly our conversations started by asking how everyone at home is, the kids, husbands, the in laws and off course “How is auntie” Ammi of every one of us. We never forget to ask about each other’s mom particularly. I guess it’s because of the close friendship that we all share with our own mothers and each other’s mom during our school finishing and college starting days. (A helping and guiding, umbrella that was always there to listen to our blab). Soon the conversation took its route to exploring each other daily activity and then after few minutes we found out that we (three of us) were actually going through the same phase of life. Regardless of the fact that one of us was totally, completely, absolutely a house wife with 4 kids, then it was my friend from other city slightly social house wife and then it was I a full time working mother. We all woke up early in the morning, made breakfast; got kids ready for school, and then off to our daily duties.  Busy with household chores, or office work. Working, working and again … working.

It was all the same. Our mid life routines were the same. The basic nature of duties was the same. None of us had time for ourselves. We seldom spent time in for our beauty treatments (old slang for activities enhancing our beauties), seldom went out for (just the couple) dinners, or a movie or even meeting up school or college fellows. Always hanging in the worries starting from “Aaj kia khana bane gaa”. Make the kids sit and do homework. Then socializing mostly with the in laws, (for me an added office pressure,) then off course it was MY Lord (our husbbies). He and his wish lists.

We realized we want to talk so much of our school days, laugh like crazy and don’t want to care about the shocked reflection of people in the restaurant. (Multiple facial reaction of: What’s wrong with these females?).For once again we all wanted to feel those moments of our lives which genuinely were missing in our present lives. All the memories of pranks with teachers and fellow students made us laugh loud and we kept on talking and laughing till the time we were exhausted. This was such a relief that we all felt so fresh and rejuvenated. It’s true that childhood is the best time in anyone’s life. Freedom to think, and take charge of your life is so different in every manner that it can not be compared with any other phase of one’s age.   

After spending few hours in such a relief  we all departed with a feeling and promises to meet up and do this reunion again some time (and thinking silently in our minds that how difficult it would be to escape again form our routine circles).

 

Mid life gals

The excitement of finally meeting one of my gal friends after a period of 11 years was not only refreshing but realizing that best friends remain on the same wave length even if they meet after ages. We were school friends since class 7^th and then went to college together and then as per usual norms (10 years ago) my friend got married after completing her bachelor’s degree. I went on with my further studies and we kept on talking on and off to be in touch but gradually this connection slipped down to few calls a year. Which was terrible but then she had 4 kids and a whole JOINT Family system TO LOOK AFTER and I MANAGED a full time corporate job, marriage and 2 kids. So we both realized that being hands full with an active life style at least we know who is where even if we call once in a while during the year. Coming back to old friend’s reunion, the meeting was all planned and pushed by another dear mutual friend of ours who lives in another city and whenever shed visited Lahore would always crave to meet up all three of us for good old school times sake, but some how we couldn’t plan out something. Finally, few days back when my friend visited from out of Lahore we managed to meet up and planned to sit down at a place and treasure our old memories. The plan was just the three of us and no kids allowed.

When we saw each other at our meeting place we actually wanted to scream like school days, hug and jump and let our manners actually go wild. But we just hugged each other warmly, greeted and sat down calmly. Slowly our conversations started by asking how everyone at home is, the kids, husbands, the in laws and off course “How is auntie” Ammi of every one of us. We never forget to ask about each other’s mom particularly. I guess it’s because of the close friendship that we all share with our own mothers and each other’s mom during our school finishing and college starting days. (A helping and guiding, umbrella that was always there to listen to our blab). Soon the conversation took its route to exploring each other daily activity and then after few minutes we found out that we (three of us) were actually going through the same phase of life. Regardless of the fact that one of us was totally, completely, absolutely a house wife with 4 kids, then it was my friend from other city slightly social house wife and then it was I a full time working mother. We all woke up early in the morning, made breakfast; got kids ready for school, and then off to our daily duties.  Busy with household chores, or office work. Working, working and again … working.

It was all the same. Our mid life routines were the same. The basic nature of duties was the same. None of us had time for ourselves. We seldom spent time in for our beauty treatments (old slang for activities enhancing our beauties), seldom went out for (just the couple) dinners, or a movie or even meeting up school or college fellows. Always hanging in the worries starting from “Aaj kia khana bane gaa”. Make the kids sit and do homework. Then socializing mostly with the in laws, (for me an added office pressure,) then off course it was MY Lord (our husbbies). He and his wish lists.

We realized we want to talk so much of our school days, laugh like crazy and don’t want to care about the shocked reflection of people in the restaurant. (Multiple facial reaction of: What’s wrong with these females?).For once again we all wanted to feel those moments of our lives which genuinely were missing in our present lives. All the memories of pranks with teachers and fellow students made us laugh loud and we kept on talking and laughing till the time we were exhausted. This was such a relief that we all felt so fresh and rejuvenated. It’s true that childhood is the best time in anyone’s life. Freedom to think, and take charge of your life is so different in every manner that it can not be compared with any other phase of one’s age.   

After spending few hours in such a relief  we all departed with a feeling and promises to meet up and do this reunion again some time (and thinking silently in our minds that how difficult it would be to escape again form our routine circles).

My Blue hair band

I don’t exactly remember how I fell in love with this hair band. I have been receiving compliments about my oriental features all my life; let it be my school, my family or even the general public. Everyone would be falling in love with my hair. I have thick silky dark brown shiny hair which have a texture and bounce that everyone would want to do anything to get something like that. It was the first summers of my school days when I was in nursery and my mom got me a hair cut that not only complimented the hair texture it also changed my look altogether that (as my mom tells me) all the teachers of my earlier playgroup class came out to notice and praise. But very next day I was instructed by my class teacher to get a hair band so that the front fringe wont be bothering my eyes when I am writing or reading. Well I gave the same message to my mom and she took me to a super store to buy something appropriate to get that fringe back for a while. And there I was in the girl’s most favorite section of hair accessories, bangles, bands and so many colorful ornaments. Running anxiously in the entire section I just didn’t know what to buy and what not. I gave my mom so many glittery glossy and gaudy things that I could pull in my tinny hands, and my mom kept saying you cant get this and you cant get that ,.. well may be we can look into this hair band and so on …..

Suddenly when I turned for another round of handful joyous goodies I saw a fresh blue colored hair band. I just picked it up and went straight to my mom. My mom looked at me and then at that hair band … exchanged a look with my dad and nodded “Ok we are going to get this”. No one of us had an idea that this momentary impulse buy would be so significant.

I was two and a half years old when I bought that hair band. From the day I bought it from that store it was on my hair, I would even put it on when I was sleeping. My mom would take it off my head when I was deep asleep cause if I would wake up during this act it was one hell of a crying session followed by a pretty bad mood for long time. I would wear it with any color of dress. Any kind, eastern or western dress (even during my swimming classes it was a must on my head). All the pictures of my that age time have a prominent icon. ..My blue hair band. Even my family and my friends at school know the importance and my love for that hair band. It was like my one thing I could not be seen without. Then one day while I was playing with my one year old brother and running after him and trying to catch him I stepped on my hair band and broke a piece of it. Suddenly all my joy of playing and jumping had stopped. It felt like I have been injured and not the hair band. My face turned red and I broke into tears. My mom held me close to her and tried to get me relieved form that shock. I kept crying for a while but in a very strange manner as if I have lost something very special. It was a very emotional session for all of my family. Everyone in the room suddenly went quite and then tried to comfort me that it will be ok we will get a new one or Dad will fix it. But I could not get that bang out of my head. When I went to see my Grandparents the first thing I told them when I entered the room was “ Dada my blue hair band is broken and I stepped on it”. my grand father gave me big hug and so did my grandmother they all knew how attached I was with my hair band.

That was quite a sad evening for all of us. My mother has kept the broken pieces of that hair band very safe as she know how I still like to talk about that hair band on and off with my friends or my cousins.

Its almost a year to this incident and my mom has bought me quite a few new hair bands but none can replace my blue hair band. It has a place no other can have.. It was my favorite hair band and it always will be.

(This is a narration of my 3 year old daughter’s reaction on her most loved favorite blue hair band that I have felt. I am not sure how she will remember this all when she grows up. So I have put it how I saw her go through this whole event)

My Blue hair band

I don’t exactly remember how I fell in love with this hair band. I have been receiving compliments about my oriental features all my life; let it be my school, my family or even the general public. Everyone would be falling in love with my hair. I have thick silky dark brown shiny hair which have a texture and bounce that everyone would want to do anything to get something like that. It was the first summers of my school days when I was in nursery and my mom got me a hair cut that not only complimented the hair texture it also changed my look altogether that (as my mom tells me) all the teachers of my earlier playgroup class came out to notice and praise. But very next day I was instructed by my class teacher to get a hair band so that the front fringe wont be bothering my eyes when I am writing or reading. Well I gave the same message to my mom and she took me to a super store to buy something appropriate to get that fringe back for a while. And there I was in the girl’s most favorite section of hair accessories, bangles, bands and so many colorful ornaments. Running anxiously in the entire section I just didn’t know what to buy and what not. I gave my mom so many glittery glossy and gaudy things that I could pull in my tinny hands, and my mom kept saying you cant get this and you cant get that ,.. well may be we can look into this hair band and so on …..

Suddenly when I turned for another round of handful joyous goodies I saw a fresh blue colored hair band. I just picked it up and went straight to my mom. My mom looked at me and then at that hair band … exchanged a look with my dad and nodded “Ok we are going to get this”. No one of us had an idea that this momentary impulse buy would be so significant.

I was two and a half years old when I bought that hair band. From the day I bought it from that store it was on my hair, I would even put it on when I was sleeping. My mom would take it off my head when I was deep asleep cause if I would wake up during this act it was one hell of a crying session followed by a pretty bad mood for long time. I would wear it with any color of dress. Any kind, eastern or western dress (even during my swimming classes it was a must on my head). All the pictures of my that age time have a prominent icon. ..My blue hair band. Even my family and my friends at school know the importance and my love for that hair band. It was like my one thing I could not be seen without. Then one day while I was playing with my one year old brother and running after him and trying to catch him I stepped on my hair band and broke a piece of it. Suddenly all my joy of playing and jumping had stopped. It felt like I have been injured and not the hair band. My face turned red and I broke into tears. My mom held me close to her and tried to get me relieved form that shock. I kept crying for a while but in a very strange manner as if I have lost something very special. It was a very emotional session for all of my family. Everyone in the room suddenly went quite and then tried to comfort me that it will be ok we will get a new one or Dad will fix it. But I could not get that bang out of my head. When I went to see my Grandparents the first thing I told them when I entered the room was “ Dada my blue hair band is broken and I stepped on it”. my grand father gave me big hug and so did my grandmother they all knew how attached I was with my hair band.

That was quite a sad evening for all of us. My mother has kept the broken pieces of that hair band very safe as she know how I still like to talk about that hair band on and off with my friends or my cousins.

Its almost a year to this incident and my mom has bought me quite a few new hair bands but none can replace my blue hair band. It has a place no other can have.. It was my favorite hair band and it always will be.

(This is a narration of my 3 year old daughter’s reaction on her most loved favorite blue hair band that I have felt. I am not sure how she will remember this all when she grows up. So I have put it how I saw her go through this whole event)